(Un)happy Valentine
Following the lead of many who have written about not-so-romantic Valentine's days, here's why we're having a quiet one:
Some time ago my husband managed to achieve that goal which I'm sure many men strive for - he convinced me, truely and absolutely, that we shouldn't celebrate Valentine's day.
It wasn't just on a whim. We'd had two pretty poor experiences - one involving our table booking being cancelled because we were going to be 15 minutes late, even though we called to let them know. And the other involving being seated at a table so uncomfortably close to the couple next to us that we may as well have been double dating.
So Adrian, who actually can't stand any of this sort of thing - it's pushing it each year just to get him to celebrate Christmas - convinced me that he didn't need one day to show me he loved me. To be fair, he's pretty good all year round at surprising me with little things he knows I like. Chocolate buttons from Hotel Chocolat, a bunch of lilies or tulips, tiny knickers....that sort of thing! I know that he would celebrate it if he thought I wanted to, and he always checks each year that I'm okay with us not doing anything to mark the occasion.
But I really am okay with it. Valentine's day was ruined for me anyway due to one awfully humilating experience when I was 8 years old that has stayed with me ever since. It was so cringe-worthy I can hardly bring myself to write this, 25 years later. It involved a boy I really, really liked, a painstakingly crafted Valentine's day card (I'd used my mum's eye shadow to colour it in) hidden in his school drawer, him finding out that it was from me and then giving it back to me in front of the entire class!
I still want to curl up and die when I think about it. When the time comes, I will never underestimate my kids childhood crushes and the agony they may bring!
Happy Valentine's Day!
(I missed this one, but for more Valentine's stories, head over to the The Valentines Carnival at The Good, The Bad, The Ugly.)
Some time ago my husband managed to achieve that goal which I'm sure many men strive for - he convinced me, truely and absolutely, that we shouldn't celebrate Valentine's day.
It wasn't just on a whim. We'd had two pretty poor experiences - one involving our table booking being cancelled because we were going to be 15 minutes late, even though we called to let them know. And the other involving being seated at a table so uncomfortably close to the couple next to us that we may as well have been double dating.
So Adrian, who actually can't stand any of this sort of thing - it's pushing it each year just to get him to celebrate Christmas - convinced me that he didn't need one day to show me he loved me. To be fair, he's pretty good all year round at surprising me with little things he knows I like. Chocolate buttons from Hotel Chocolat, a bunch of lilies or tulips, tiny knickers....that sort of thing! I know that he would celebrate it if he thought I wanted to, and he always checks each year that I'm okay with us not doing anything to mark the occasion.
But I really am okay with it. Valentine's day was ruined for me anyway due to one awfully humilating experience when I was 8 years old that has stayed with me ever since. It was so cringe-worthy I can hardly bring myself to write this, 25 years later. It involved a boy I really, really liked, a painstakingly crafted Valentine's day card (I'd used my mum's eye shadow to colour it in) hidden in his school drawer, him finding out that it was from me and then giving it back to me in front of the entire class!
I still want to curl up and die when I think about it. When the time comes, I will never underestimate my kids childhood crushes and the agony they may bring!
Happy Valentine's Day!
(I missed this one, but for more Valentine's stories, head over to the The Valentines Carnival at The Good, The Bad, The Ugly.)
posted by solveig at
8:42 am
6 Comments:
Aaah I just want to scoop your 8-yr-old self up and give you a big hug. Bless.
we just scoffed a waitrose microwave curry in about 3 minutes before my husb legged it out the door to do a night shift.... and i had to switch charlie and lola on during that 3 minutes! romantic it was not. and i bought myself some flowers. while pretending that it was actually my 20mo son who had done so! (to be fair, i know my husb would if he'd seen some.)
@Young Mummy - thank you! My husband read this post and turns out I'd never even told him about this little incident!
@Babies who brunch - I like that you (or rather your son...!) bought yourself flowers!
S x
I had a card and flowers and we took the kids to the seaside for the day, but we've long ceased to make a big thing of it.
I'm sure if Doug could do spontaneous we would probably stop bothering about it, but he's much better with specific things he can put in his diary and know what is expected of him :)
@Rowan - I actually think using it as a day to do something all together as a family is a great idea.
We had lunch out with Adrian's grandfather - just us lot, no other customers, in an Indian restaurant at lunch time, surrounded by hearts and balloons! But we had a great time.
S x
We're the same about Valentine's day. (And hoorah for Hotel Chocolat!!)
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