I Am Woman - through my rose tinted specs!
Well it's an obvious one, and I'm not sure I'd say it's something I'm 'guilty' of, just something I, and probably many other women, do - I definitely view the births of my children with rose coloured spectacles!
Freyja's in particular has taken on some kind of mystical quality in my mind, where I'm sure I wafted around the room in a floaty piece of chiffon, listening to tinkling music and then popped her out with barely a sigh. The reality, I well know, was me huffing around, totally starkers, in a room in Lewisham hospital, throwing up and crying.
It actually was a very easy, straightfoward birth and although I do know that of course it hurt like hell, I look back on it still and think - wow, I did that!
Part of the reason that Freyja's birth has been elevated to the status of 'perfect birth' in my mind is because Theo's didn't go quite as well. As far as births go, it was still pretty simple and trouble free but I know that I felt quite out of control, that the pain was intense and then there was the small matter of me thinking he wasn't actually alive when he came out...
But even his birth has been transformed into some kind of goddess like feat to my mind's eye. I may have felt on verge of panicking and I may have told myself that I was never, ever going to put myself through this again - and yet I look back on it and what I feel is elation.
The pain, the worry, the exhaustion - it's all gone. All I remember is feeling like the strongest woman alive.
Thank goodness for rose tinted spectacles. And hormones...
(written for Sleep is for the Weak's Writing Workshop No 10)
posted by solveig at
8:48 AM
4 Comments:
LOL! Loved your post.
It's funny how we're so capable of romanticising the most painful experience that we choose to go through - and lucky that we do!
Px
I am totally with you on this one. My first birth wasn't great, but compared to the second one it has assumed a much more iconic status - and one that gets easier with each telling of the story!
Thanks for your comments!
Battleplan - I remember a (male...) friend of mine once saying to me that it's the men who should be pitied because the women get this surge of hormones at the end which helps them forget, while the men have to remember the full reality for the rest of their lives!!
Hearth-mother - funny how everyone says second births are easier!
I swear our bodies make us forget how painful it really was, else we'd never do it again!
I had a pretty scary experience with Kai and even now I'm thinking "ohh it wasn't that bad...!"
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